I always pray for you but you don’t seem to have a guardian angel 17.6.2012

It has been a busy weekend!  Friday afternoon Reuben and Nonthanthle came to visit.  Reuben is my son from another mother and Nonthanthle is his beautiful wife.  She is 14 weeks pregnant with their first baby.  Life and death go hand-in-hand and I wonder if this is the baby that will celebrate Vic’s life?

Reuben is a pastor in a poor community.  He is an amazing person filled with love and compassion.  I truly admire him for all the hurdles he has overcome in life.  He is proud and yet not scared to talk about his fears.  He fears that he will not be a good father to the baby… It made me think: What makes a good father? 

So today, on Fathersday, I reflected on fatherhood…

I was blessed with a wonderful father.  My Dad was a gentleman as well as a gentle man.  He was a  wonderful provider, husband, father and friend.  A cruel blow of fate was dealt this wonderful, proud  man when he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s.  Mercifully my dad succumbed to Alzheimer’s Pneumonia on the 20th of May 2011.  So, even though I could not wish him a happy Fathersday today, I have first hand experience and knowledge  of what a good father should be like…

Danie is a wonderful father to Vic.  If she had been a biological child he could not have been more caring and loving than he is.   Vic’s own father could not handle the guilt knowing that he was a carrier of Osteogenesis Imperfecta.  He coped with the diagnosis by walking away.  He could not handle seeing her broken little body knowing that it was his genes that caused it.  We were so young.  I no longer judge him but I am grateful that he is not around to see her suffering now.  I know that when the time comes Tienie will be around to help her pass…

Vic so desperately wanted to get out of bed to be with the family at lunch.  Poor poppet only made it to the bathroom.  She sobbed her little heart out.  Esther, gentle soul that she is, lay with Vic until her sobs subsided. .. Eventually the pain meds kicked in and she was able to  sleep peacefully for a while.

I received a sms from Robbie (Vic’s  friend) and she wrote ” I feel so sorry for you all.  Poor Vicky.  Its too awful.  For all of you.  One wonders if God is watching.  I always pray for you but you don’t seem to have a guardian angel”

 Some days I agree.  Today after having the kids around for the day I disagree.  Guardian angels come in many different forms.  Some come as a  young pastor  who travels far and at great expense to come and pray for Mercy, a sister (Esther) who lies beside Vic and cries with her, another sister (Lani) who brings flowers and milk tart, a Dad  who takes Vic toast and coffee at 06:30 so she can have tablets.  We are surrounded by guardian angels…

I pray that Vic will have a good night’s sleep – undisturbed by pain. 

I pray for just one more good day with the boys. 


Published by


I am a sixty plenty wife, mother, sister, grandmother and friend. I started blogging as a coping mechanism during my beautiful daughter's final journey. Vic was desperately ill for 10 years after a botched back operation. Vic's Journey ended on 18 January 2013 at 10:35. She was the most courageous person in the world and has inspired thousands of people all over the world. Vic's two boys are monuments of her existence. She was an amazing mother, daughter, sister and friend. I will miss you today, tomorrow and forever my Angle Child. https://tersiaburger.wordpress.com

3 thoughts on “I always pray for you but you don’t seem to have a guardian angel 17.6.2012”

  1. You know Vicky is always in my prayers, and I am glad the family were able to share the weekend together. Hugs and prayers to you, my friend.


Comments are closed.