Today I wore Vic’s pearls and perfume.
Her favourite perfume, Beautiful – Estee Lauder, reacts differently to my skin but I could smell “her smell” on me the whole day.
My meetings went well. I am happy with the outcome. It is as if my soul is removed from my body – I feel as if I am looking in from the outside. I see and hear a confident, poised person talking in a matter of fact tone of voice. I hear myself asking intelligent questions and yet it is a shell sitting there.
No-one sees my sadness and grief.
I miss Vic more and more as each day passes by. I am starting to realise that Vic is truly never coming home! The house is big and empty!