We have stopped living … 2.6.2012


Vic did not have a good day today.  She is in so much pain.  She is very swollen – I think it is a kidney thing again.  Swelling, headache, nausea = kidneys.  I suspect she has fractured another vertebra – quite high up this time.  (At any given time Vic has a couple of compression fractures in her spine.)  Poor little poppet- she was quite miserable today.

Jared was at Rene’s (his school councillor) home for a 7.5 hours math marathon session today!  She is an amazing individual with so much love and compassion.  She has taken Jared under her wing and sacrificed her Saturday for him!  How amazing can one be?  Tomorrow after band practice at school he will go to her again for a couple of hours of maths.  Jon-Daniel had a cricket match in the morning and spent the afternoon watching rugby with his Oupie.  Esther and Yuri popped around for tea and Esther spent some time with Vic.  I had a little afternoon nap = bliss!!!

Danie is a little annoyed with me.  He is going on a breakfast run with some friends, Esther and Leon.  He really wants me to go with – he even went and filled up my bike and checked the tyres…I can’t go.  I have this stupid fear that I may fall and then, who will look after my family?  If something happens to me – who will take care of my child?  Am I becoming paranoid?  Maybe!  I sometimes think we have all stopped living – we still breathe but we don’t live.  We have however learnt to live the day.  Yesterday we cannot change and tomorrow we cannot plan.  One day at a time.  In Vic’s case – one slow, pain-filled day at a time…

Tomorrow we will spend the day trying to convince Vic to go for the Ketamine infusion…It will be a difficult dayImage

Published by

tersiaburger

I am a sixty something wife,mother, sister, grandmother and friend. I started blogging as a coping mechanism during my beautiful daughter's final journey. Vic was desperately ill for 10 years after a botched back operation. Vic's Journey ended on 18 January 2013 at 10:35. She was the most courageous person in the world and has inspired thousands of people all over the world. Vic's two boys are monuments of her existence. She was an amazing mother, daughter, sister and friend. I will miss you today, tomorrow and forever my Angle Child. https://tersiaburger.wordpress.com

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