“I am sorry Mommy!”

3 years ago. This post brought it all back. Oh God, when will it get better? When will the longing and sorrow end?

Vic's Final Journey

Vicky constantly says “sorry Mommy.”   She says “sorry Mommy” when she vomits, when she is in pain, when she is ill…

Then there is a flood of “thank you’s”….. Vic says “thank you” all the time!  It drives me mad! I don’t want her to apologize for being ill and I don’t want her to continuously thank me.

Vic’s situation, our situation as a family, is unfair, arbitrary, frustrating and so sad.  Vic is blameless, helpless, a victim of poor sick genes and doctor error.

I know that Vic is sad about her situation.  I know that Vic is sad for what the family is going through.  She is sad because she cannot be the mother she wants to be.  She is sad that she has a lonely, sad life devoid of partner love, physical love and friendships not based on pity.  She sad because she does not have a…

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