Tag: Cardiovascular Disorders

Aging….


I am so grateful that I am no longer young. I received this in an email and thought I should share it!!As I’ve aged, I’ve become kinder to myself, and less critical of myself.

I’ve become my own friend.


I have seen too many dear friends leave this world, too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.


Whose business is it, if I choose to read, or play, on the computer, until 4 AM, or sleep until noon? I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 50, 60 &70 ‘s, and if I, at the same time, wish to weep over a lost love, I will.


I will walk the beach, in a swim suit that is stretched over a bulging body, and will dive into the waves, with abandon, if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the jet set. They, too, will get old.


I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten. And, I eventually remember the important things.


Sure, over the years, my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break, when you lose a loved one, or when a child suffers, or even when somebody’s beloved pet gets hit by a car? But, broken hearts are what give us strength, and understanding, and compassion. A heart never broken, is pristine, and sterile, and will never know the joy of being imperfect.

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I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair turning grey, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into deep grooves on my face. So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could turn silver. As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don’t question myself anymore. I’ve even earned the right to be wrong. So, to answer your question, I like being old. It has set me free. I like the person I have become. I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be. And I shall eat dessert every single day (if I feel like it). 

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The final battle


Vic and JD watching a movie on the laptop
Vic and JD watching a movie on the laptop

For the past couple of days JD has not eaten well and lost control over her bowels a couple of times.  This morning she looked at me with her beautiful, soulful brown eyes and whimpered….

A couple of times we have had her paloured for her final journey and then my courage forsook me.  I kept finding excuses why she should not go for an injection.  Her cough was better, “she has a sparkle in her eye”,” she “bounced” around her snack”….  Yesterday I gave her some of her all time favorite treats i.e. dried sausage (droëwors) and she did not touch it!

Last night she sat upright – I think it was too difficult to breathe.  JD had congenital heart failure.

Today Danie came home from a business appointment and I said “It is time”.  He knew exactly what I was saying.  Vic came through and sat on the carpet with JD.  She said goodbye.   I picked JD up and walked to the car.  Danie drove.

We took JD to our local SPCA.  A young, sympathetic, female veterinarian asked me if I wanted to leave.  I said “No.”  She battled to find a vein.  “It’s the congenital heart failure” she said.

“She is almost 16 years old” I said.

“Wow, she is really very old.  She is a pretty little dog” she said

“Have you ever had a dog euthanized?”  she asked

“No” I said

“I will inject an anesthetic into her veins and she will fall asleep.  She may have a muscle contraction or a bowel movement.  It will be unpleasant for you but not for JD.  She would have passed on.”

“Okay” I said

She found a vein and JD slipped away whilst my tears fell on her coat.

At 12:05 on the 24th of August 2012 JD went to Doggie Heaven.