What a wonderful caring community I have entered. I occasionally get a personal email from someone, who read my blog, and has a special word of encouragement for us as a family. I truly appreciate it.
I find that I am constantly coming back to my blog and emails so see if there is any new advice or message. I may be developing an emotional dependence upon the support I am getting from the blogging community….
I am re-posting an email that I received today from Alison of Tapestries of Hope. “Tapestries of Hope is a central New Jersey non-profit dedicated to honoring each woman in the community who is grieving the death of her mom or mother figure. Tapestries was created to provide a peer supportive environment for women to express their grief through workshops, support groups, expressive arts, and programs for continued healing.” I was reduced to tears by her loving, compassionate email. I want to share the compassion that we have been shown. I was so concerned about baring my tattered soul to the world that I was hesitant to start the blog…It is the greatest thing I have ever done.
Alison, thank you for your kind words. You how no idea how “bruised” and isolated I felt today, Thank you for showing me that you care and that there is a caring world out there – even if only in cyberspace! Thank you for taking the time to write me a personal email. You are a special lady!
Forgive me for not emailing you right away. I’ve been reading the blog you’re keeping as Vic goes through her illness, and I’ve been touched beyond measure as I read of her struggle, yours, the joy, the roller coaster of emotions. And it took my breath away to listen to the song you dedicated to her “Never Alone”. One of the events we sponsor here at Tapestries of Hope is our yearly pre-Mother’s day gathering, called “Our Moms, Our Memories” and that is the song that one of the daughters sang two years ago.
I worked in hospice for many years, and our current president, Alisa, works at one now, as bereavement coordinator. I don’t know how hospice is in your part of the world, but I’m a strong proponent of it. It makes an impossible time just a little bit more manageable, and I hope your Vic, and you, will make use of it when you decide the time is right. My sister and I called in hospice for my 36 year old brother, Kysa, when he was ill with cancer, and again 6 months later when my mom, Betty Catharine, died of breast cancer. It was my experience with them that led me, ultimately, to work for hospice and then found Tapestries of Hope along with Alisa.
There are no words that I can give you that will make any of this better, but I want you to know that I understand your wishing so desperately for your mom to be here with you now, to listen, to help, to be there for you. My husband Chuck went through a very aggressive cancer last year (thankfully he has a clean bill of health now) but through it I wished for nothing more than to be able to call my mom and know that, even if nothing changed, I would feel better after speaking with her.
If you would like to connect with other daughters who have grieved their moms, I can put you in touch with so many. We have well over 200 daughters who make up Tapestries, both locally in NJ and around the country. We have a facebook page also, and you can find so much support there. Just type “Tapestries of Hope” into your search engine, and you will find us.
Whatever I can do to offer support to you as you find your way through this, please reach out. I’m very approachable and spend so much of my time chatting with daughters and emailing back and forth with them.
Please stay in touch when you can~
daughter of Betty Catharine