Watching my child slowly die, doing her eulogy and living 424 days without her are the most difficult things I have had to do. Today I discovered another impossibly difficult thing to do… My child’s estate.
This morning I had to walk into the bank and ask for the last three months of my child’s bank statements. When the lady asked whether she could help I replied that I needed duplicate bank statements. She kindly directed me to a booth and asked for my ID document. I explained that I was looking for the duplicate bank statements of my dead child… and burst into tears.
My hands were shaking as I tried to find Vic’s death certificate and her identity document. The tears prevented me for seeing what I was looking for.
The bank clerk handed me a tissue and said “I am sorry for your loss”.
A second bank official walked in and immediately asked what’s wrong. I could not speak and the first lady explained what I was looking for. She put out her arms and hugged me.
“I lost my son three years ago…” she said. “I know how you feel…”
Some days are more difficult than other. Some days I am able to live my new life. Most days I am able to live my new life. My life without my precious, beautiful baby girl. But there are days that the grief just overwhelms me and I am a wreck. Today is a one of those earth and heart shattering sad days.
I closed Vic’s bank account today.