Today was another milestone for Vic and the family. Jon-Daniel turned 14 and he woke up to his loving mother’s birthday wishes and kisses.
I could not help but think back to the day he started “big” school. Vic was violently ill but refused to be admitted to hospital before Jon-Daniel was taken to “big” school and settled into his new class… Seven years ago she placed her own life at risk to take her son’s hand in hers and lead him into a scary new phase of his little life.
Vic kneeled next to his little chair and told him school was going to be one of the greatest adventures in his life. She told him she loved him and he was in good hands. His brother would look out for him at break. He had to concentrate and listen to his teacher. “Mommy will see you after school” she promised.
When we left the classroom Vic collapsed. Colin took her straight to hospital. Silent tears ran down her cheeks.
“Mommy, please bring the boys to hospital this afternoon. I promised Jon-Daniel I will see him after school.”
I do not remember the exact details of that particular hospitalization episode but I do remember what a milestone Vic reached that day…
Yesterday my little girl dragged her body out of bed. When Vic and the boys moved home a year ago I bought her a doughnut-making machine. She had not used it. Jon-Daniel loves baby doughnuts and keeps asking her when they are going to make doughnuts. So, Vic made baby doughnuts with Jon-Daniel yesterday afternoon. It wasn’t a big batch but she was absolutely exhausted and in terrible pain after she finished his “birthday doughnuts”.
I wonder if he will ever realise what a superhuman effort it took for his mother to make him birthday doughnuts….
Vic bought Jon-Daniel a sound system for his 14th birthday some time ago. It has been wrapped and ribboned for a while. I am so grateful Vic was able to give it to him, in person, this morning…. He was absolutely delighted! The boys had to go to their Dad this evening so Vic made the decision to take Jon-Daniel out of school early today. We did not have the normal “tea and cake” thing at home as we simply did not have enough time. We went to lunch and had a wonderful time! We screeched with laughter. The boys joked with Vic because she is so short…. (She loves being ragged about her (lack of) height) and the boys love humouring her!
“Mom can’t do a ‘high five’ Oumie – she is too short…” They just carried on and on joking with their mom.
Late afternoon, after the boys left, Vic and I quietly sat basking in the milestone day….
Vic said “You did not blog last night Mommy….”
“I know sweetie. I did reblog the article on Meredith Thomas. (https://tersiaburger.com/2012/10/11/lots-of-tears-with-less-than-a-few-months-to-live/ ) I was too sad to blog after reading that article. It really affected me you know…”
“It is so sad Mommy. I wish I could write to her and tell her what an inspiration she is to me…” Vic said. “I am so scared…. I have a hollow feeling on my tummy.”
We just sat in silence. I held her little hand knowing what she was saying. I did not have words for my little girl.
“I have such a good idea for your Christmas gift but I need the boys to help me.” she said
“Well, in 6 weeks’ time the boys will have finished their exams and they will have lots of time to help you.” I said
“I can’t wait that long Mommy. My health is too precarious. I must do it now…..”
With a hollow feeling on my tummy I wonder whether we will reach our next milestone….
Vic's Final Journey 
i had to kind of laugh at this, sorry. i have birthday presents for family and friends in a container, i also have christmas gifts and have had for months. on the back closet wall is a list of every gift in the box along with who they are for and the date of their birthday. it is one of those things that we (vic and i) have in common.
it is a sad reality that we hope for more time and plan for it to end. she obviously is one lucky woman with so much love in her life. the great thing is, she knows it. it is so touching to read of how you care for each other and treasure what you have. her boys are going to lose her sooner than most yet they are going to truly know what the love of a parent is.. some of us are not so blessed. they have you and your husband, but they have had the dedicated love of their mother. amazing!
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Dear Cyberfriend, Sadly you and Vic are travelling the same road. Your memory will live forever with your loved ones as will Vic’s – with or without gifts. The biggest gift you can give us, is the gift of your love and time… I think of you every day and often when I look at Vic… I wonder how you are doing….
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My prayers are with you. You are both very courageous. May God be with you.
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Thank you – sometimes I don’t know how or for what to pray…
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Reblogged this on Vic's Final Journey and commented:
And yesterday Jon-Daniel turned 17. Happy birthday my precious Jon-Daniel.
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i am so grateful that i had this time to know a brave young woman named vic, her loving mother and her magnificent sons who are becoming the men she knew they would be in time.
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