I am taking a break from your blog

Jared and Vic lighting Jon-Daniel’s 13 Candles 12.10.2011


People have said “I am taking a break from your blog.  It is too difficult for me to read” or “Some days I just cannot read your blog”….. Listen up people on the 20th of July 2012 I blogged “When we first received Vic’s death sentence there was an absolute outpouring of love.  But I suppose she did not die soon enough and people slowly and discreetly disappeared out of our lives.  My blog is three months old and most of you too may get tired of the waiting game and stop reading it and disappear into cyberspace.  Well, this time you cannot hurt us because you are faceless.https://tersiaburger.com/2012/07/20/thank-you-god-20-7-2012/

My best friend says my blog is sad and I suppose it is.  The blog however mirrors my deepest feelings.  It is our journey and you (the royal you) don’t have to feel you are under an obligation to read my “sad” blog.

Well today I will however try and blog some happy moments.  Jon-Daniel, Vic’s youngest son, turns 14 on Friday the 12 th of October.  We are busy arranging his birthday party.  He wants a pool party but I don’t think the weather will co-operate!  Weather predictions are 80% chance of rain on Saturday!

Vic was born on one of the coldest days of the year.  I remember sitting hunched up in front of the fireplace saying “if ever I am going to have this baby it is going to be tonight!”  I finished work that day and was looking forward to my maternity leave.  I had weird little contractions at work but paid no attention to it.  My back was killing me!  But I had work to finish and the staff held a little “stork party” for me.  I lost my temper with someone at work and yelled at him!  I ate ice-cream in front of a heater and craved a milkshake!  It was such a busy day.

My case had not been packed as Vic was only due a month later….In true Vicky form she decided “enough is enough” and I went into labor that evening!  Vic is a “lingerer” and was born 27.5 hours after I went into labor.

When I was admitted my mother-in-law accompanied me.  She was plumpish with a youthful face.  The maternity staff thought she was being admitted…. I only gained 8 pounds (3.64 kilograms) and barely looked pregnant.  I still wore all my normal clothes.

When Vic was born she was so perfect!  Her father said “Oh, look she has my toes!”  She was heartbreakingly beautiful with a mop of black hair!

Some facts – Vic weighed in at 2.2 kilograms.  She was a mere 48 cm tall.  She was tiny but so strong and perfect!  She was the best “pooper” in the maternity ward.  Vic was a bottle baby and her preemies clothes were too big for her.

For the first two months of her life I was too scared to bath her.  My mom did.  Vic walked at 17 months but had her first tooth at 3 months.  She had her first fracture at 3 weeks – sucking her thumb!

Vic was diagnosed at 18 months with Osteogenesis Imperfecta.  By her 4th birthday she had fractured 40 bones.  Vic spoke her first words before she could sit and built basic wooden puzzles before her 1st birthday. Vic spoke Afrikaans and English fluently by the time she was 3.

At the time of diagnoses the doctors said she would not live to the age of 12.  Well she certainly showed them!

Every single birthday of Vic’s we have had lousy weather!  It was always the last cold before spring sets in on the 1st of September.

Vic does not have a good sense of humour.  Wait, let me rephrase that – Vic cannot tell a joke!  She loves a good laugh.  She has a beautiful smile that reaches her eyes.  Her dark brown eyes are truly the mirror to her soul.  Her eyes are now either clouded from morphine or pain.  Her eyes now “tear up” even when she is not crying.

Vicky is a people pleaser.  She will do everything in her power to make people happy.  She is also the most stubborn person the good Lord put on this earth.

Vic is a wonderful mother.  She loves her sons unconditionally.  Jared is her gentle giant.  He helps her mobilize and makes her coffee.  He will make her breakfast and lunch.    He is gentle and tender with his Mom.  He will carry her when she cannot walk.  He protects her…. He has a brilliant analytical mind.  He hates homework and studying.  He under achieves at school.  His room is not the tidiest in the world.  He is an accomplished guitarist.  Jared is generous and has an easy smile.  Jared is her eldest.



Jon-Daniel is the genius (he has my brain – hahaha).  He is a perfectionist and when he leaves for school his room is perfectly tidy.  He immediately starts homework when he gets home.  His lowest mark is for art – 78%.  He is an accomplished sportsman.  He only watches sport on TV and knows all the international soccer greats, tennis and cricket players.  He makes Vic laugh.  He fools around until she screeches with laughter.  He is angry because she is ill.  Even as a little boy he would cry to see Vic when she was in hospital.  Once he saw her he would start acting up – insisting that we leave!  He even saves airtime…. Jon-Daniel is her baby.

Vic loves her boys and her boys adore her.  I wish their lives were easier.  I wish I could save them the pain they live on a daily basis.